In this article, I lay out several principles for Christian parenting from the Shema.
That Moses had parenting in mind as he wrote the Shema can be seen in verse 2, which says that God was to be obeyed and feared by “you and your son and your son’s son,” and in verse 7, which says that Israel needed be diligent to teach God’s Word to their children. As he was about to die, Moses was concerned about how the faith would be passed down from generation to generation. This was because the success of Israel and their remaining in the land would be contingent upon later generations being faithful to the words of Moses. For this to happen, fathers and mothers needed to diligently teach their children the Word of God.
The Word Must be Pervasive in Your Life (6:6–9)
Before an Israelite could teach his children, however, he needed to have the Word in his own heart. This is why Moses said, “these words that I command you today shall be on your heart” (Deut 6:6), before he gave the instruction, “you shall teach them diligently to your children” (Deut 6:7). The referent of “them” are the commands of Moses. In Deuteronomy, Moses reissued the Law—he had just repeated the 10 Commandments, and he went on to lay out the covenantal obligations of Israel—before they entered the promised land. These words were to have an enduring place in the life of the nation.
An illustration of how this went horribly wrong is found in 2 Kings. Josiah was a notable king, first, because he started to reign when he was eight years old, but also, because he was a good king. A quick perusal of the kings of Israel and Judah will demonstrate that such was the exception and not the norm. Josiah reigned in the seventh century BC and his rule lasted for thirty-one years. During the eighteenth year of his reign, Josiah commissioned for repairs to be made to the temple. Consequently, the high priest found the Book of the Law in the temple, and upon hearing the Law read by his secretary, Josiah tore his clothes. This good king of Israel realized, to his horror, that the kings before him had not been faithful to keep the covenant and thus the nation was in danger because God’s wrath was kindled against them (2 Kings 22:1–13). The lesson is this: the people had become idolatrous because the Word had not been in their heart; the reason why the Word was not in their heart was because the Book of the Law had been lost, ironically, somewhere in the temple.
This is why the Shema says that the Word of God must be everywhere in the life of an Israelite—throughout all his activities, and throughout his days. Later, Jews took verse 8 literally, placing little Scripture scrolls into a container and wearing it on their foreheads.[1] Verse 9 refers to the commands being written on the doorposts and the gates, which were entryways into Jewish homes and cities, respectively. These verses do not need to be taken literally—Christians do not need to wear boxes containing Bible verses on their heads and they are not required to paint Bible verses on the doorframes of their homes. A Christian must, however, value God’s Word. The Word must be all around us and it must be pervasive in our lives.
Further, the Shema calls for believers to regularly have the Word of God on our lips; put another way, it must be pervasive in our conversations. It is a strange phenomenon that in the Canadian evangelical church, people can talk about all kinds of topics—politics, the economy, sports, and the like—except spiritual ones. The Shema urges you to make talking about the Bible, theology, and the sermon a regular part of your conversations. We need to get over that initial hurdle and awkwardness and make talking about God, his Word, and our spiritual lives a regular part of conversations in our churches.
Prioritize Discipleship in the Home
In verse 7, Moses says, “You shall teach them diligently to your children.” This verse teaches that it is the parent’s responsibility to teach their children the Bible. A critical way in which the faith is passed down to the next generation is through discipleship that takes place in the home. Thus, if you are a Christian parent, it is your responsibility to ensure that your child knows who God is, what he is like, and what he requires of them.
At this point, you might retort and say, “Well, isn’t that the job of the pastors of my church?” We will talk about the role of the church in a moment, but let’s consider this from a practical standpoint. Your pastor is not at your house when your child wakes up; the church leadership are not there when your child disobeys; and the elders are not there when your child comes home and is confused about a comment that his teacher made about gender identity. But you are. At your church, you may have a Youth Pastor, or a Children’s Ministry Director, but even the impact that they can have on your child pales in comparison to your influence upon your son or daughter. Brother and sister, take advantage of the opportunity that God has given you to impact your children for the sake of the gospel; no one is better positioned to carry out that work.
Parent over the Long-Haul
One of the challenges of parenting is that you must repeat yourself, well, repeatedly. You tell your son not to jump off the couch, only to watch him leap off the sofa five seconds later. We think that giving the instruction should be sufficient. The Shema, however, suggests that we must instruct our children repeatedly. It is through repeated instruction that the Word of God becomes engraved on a child’s heart and conscience.[2] That’s why you cannot deliver a lecture on selflessness to your son and expect that he will never act as if he is the centre of the universe. If you have a teenager, you cannot explain to her once that she does not need to be paralyzed by what others think of her and expect that she will never struggle with social anxiety again; that is simply not how it works.
Part of the reason we need to have the Word always on our lips is because our children need repeated instruction.[3] They need to be told the same thing repeatedly, because the primary problem with children is not lack of knowledge, but lack of conformity to his Word in all areas of life.
Parent in the Local Church
Earlier, I said that it is primarily the responsibility of Christian parents to disciple their children. I stand by that statement, but the church has a part to play also. The church’s role is to come alongside Christian parents to encourage them, equip them, and supplement the work that they do at home. Remember that the Shema was not a call to Jewish family units, but to the nation as a whole: “Hear, O Israel” (Deut 6:4).
The way for Christians to apply the Shema is not to cloister into their little Christian families and detach themselves from the local church. It is unhealthy for believers to try to live out their Christian lives detached from the local church. Therefore, lean into the local church. In some ways, if you consistently bring your family to church on Sundays and involve your family in the life of the local church, that’s half the battle won. Why? Because you are demonstrating to your children the supremacy of God in your life by prioritizing the preaching of the Word and fellowship with God’s people. You are saying to your child, without ever saying a word, that the worship of God, the preaching of the Word, and being with his people, are all essential to your Christian life. In this regard, the old adage is true, “It is more caught than taught.”
Parent with the Gospel
There is a certain logic to biblical revelation. God gave Israel the Law after he delivered them from bondage in Egypt. God delivered them first, then gave them the Law; that order is important. We do not obey God’s Word in order to experience God’s deliverance; rather, we obey God’s Word because we have already experienced God’s deliverance. When an Israelite father was asked by his child the meaning of the commands of Moses, the father was to remind the son of the redemption that God had accomplished for Israel in the Exodus (Deut 6:20–24).
As Christian parents, we must instill morality into our children. They should know what is right and wrong, according to the Scriptures, because we have taught it to them. But in addition to rules and morality, we must tell them that the reason we obey God’s Word is because he has saved us through the second Exodus accomplished by his Son. Jesus has delivered us, not from bondage to slavery in Egypt, but from bondage to sin, and he has saved us, not through the sacrifice of the Passover lamb, but through the sacrifice of himself on the cross.
Christian parent, you can do this. You can tell your children what God requires of them; you can tell them that, in this house, we obey and serve the Lord because he has accomplished a mighty redemption for us. There are tons of good resources to help you in this, depending on the age of your children. The point is, though, get your children into the Word. Further, tell your children your testimony of how God worked in your life to save you. Last, when you sin against your child, confess your sin to him and ask for his forgiveness, because what better way to put the gospel on display than to show your child that daddy needs Jesus too.
If you are feeling overwhelmed with the task of discipling your children, I hope that I have made it clear that Christian parenting is not rocket science. It does not require a seminary degree or formal theological training. The argument of the Shema is get into the Word yourself, have the Word richly dwell within you, and get the Word into your children.
Conclusion
As the Shema was central to the life of Israel, a central passage for the church is the Great Commission. The greater Moses, having just accomplished redemption for his people, was about to depart from this world. He went up on a mountain and declared, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age” (Matt 28:18–20).
In his excellent book, Parenting, Paul Tripp says,
I cannot think of any directive from the mouth of Jesus that is a more appropriate call to every Christian parent than this one [referring to Matt 28:18–20]. . . . Your job is to do everything within your power, as an instrument in the hands of the Redeemer who has employed you, to woo, encourage, call, and train your children to willingly and joyfully live as disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ. This is more important than how they do in school, or how positively they contribute to the reputation of your family, or how well they set themselves up for a future career, or how well they do in sports and the arts, or how well they are liked by adults and peers. . . . Here’s the core mission of parents: to raise up children who approach everything in their lives as the disciples of Jesus.[4]
Brothers and sisters, we are followers of the Lord Jesus and have been commissioned by him to make disciples. This discipleship begins in our own homes. If you are overwhelmed or discouraged, take heart, for Jesus says, “all authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me.” Christ is more committed to the advance of the gospel in your home than you are, and he has given you both the method and message for the task. As you are up in the middle of the night with your newborn, or dealing with the tantrum of your toddler, or facing the disrespect of your eight-year-old, or navigating the hormonal changes of your pre-teen, or helping your teenager’s struggles with anxiety, peer pressure, and temptation, Jesus promises to be with you, by his Holy Spirit, every step of the way.
[1] Gary Hardin, “Frontlets,” in Holman Illustrated Bible Dictionary, ed. Chad Brand et al. (Nashville, TN: Holman Bible, 2003), 603.
[2] Eugene H. Merrill says, “The image is that of the engraver of a monument who takes hammer and chisel in hand and with painstaking care etches a text into the face of a solid slab of granite. . . . In less figurative terms and yet with clear hyperbole, Moses said that the way this message is made indelible is by constant repetition. Eugene H. Merrill, Deuteronomy, vol. 4, The New American Commentary (Nashville: Broadman & Holman, 1994), 167.
[3] Michael A. Grisanti, Deuteronomy, in The Expositor’s Bible Commentary, vol. 2, Numbers–Ruth, ed. Tremper Longman III and David E. Garland, rev. ed. (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2012), 558; Merrill, Deuteronomy, 167.
[4] Paul Tripp, Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles that Can Radically Change Your Family (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2016), 183–84.
