This article is the first in a four-part series titled From Eden to Eternity: Christ at the Heart of Your Marriage. It’s based on messages my husband, Dan, and I gave at a marriage conference at Muskoka Bible Center. We taught on a biblical vision of marriage from the four epochs of redemptive history: Creation, fall, redemption, and new creation.
Genesis 1-2 paints the perfect picture of marital bliss. Who wouldn’t want to go to sleep single and wake up from a long siesta to the perfect match standing naked before them? Yet it feels far from our reality. Even the best marriages face a breaking of the one-flesh union. You might look at your spouse—especially if, like us, you met online—and think, “This wasn’t on their profile!”
The disappointments of human marriage point us toward the only one who can truly satisfy our hearts. When we expect a spouse to fill that hole, we turn them into an idol. A joyful marriage only grows when Christ is on the throne, allowing our love for one another to flow from our love for him. Only then, with our affections rightly ordered, can we reflect God’s harmony as his image bearers.
God’s timeless message to us from our text is:
Because God and all that he created is good, let’s reflect his goodness in our marriages.
Our passage then offers us four calls to action:
1. Recognize God’s Design (Genesis 1:1–25)
The first 25 verses of Genesis draw a picture of our all-powerful God creating everything out of nothing. On days 1–3, God makes and separates the sky, the sea, and the land. On days 4–6, he fills each of these with the sun, moon, stars, and every living creature. After each day, he openly admires his handiwork. Like a refrain over the song of creation, the text tells us six times: “God saw that it was good.”
2. Reflect God’s Image (Genesis 1:26–31)
Up until this point, the poetic rhythm of the creation account follows a certain pattern. Here, God departs from that pattern. He pauses to consult the Trinity and perhaps even the angels when he states, “Let us make man in our image…” (v. 26). He then gives them dominion over every living thing (v. 26). He blesses them (v. 28). And he communicates to them the dominion he has already established for them (vv. 29-30). Then, and only then, does he look upon his completed work of creation and declare that it is not merely good, but very good indeed!
The importance of image-bearing, or Imago Dei, is difficult to overstate. It means that we reflect to one another a glory God reserved for human beings. We share a dignity and worth that sets us apart from animals and enables us to be rational, volitional agents. We see this in part in our ability to reason, choose, create, and enter into a meaningful relationships with God and one another. It also enables us to rule over creation.
The fact that every human is made in God’s image should govern all of our relationships, whether it’s our spouse, children, colleagues, neighbours, or the people we disagree with online. May this truth help us resist the urge to harm and instead speak words of life.
The Cultural Mandate: God’s Call to Reign Over Creation
God’s first command is known as the Cultural Mandate. It consists of four imperatives, or actions that God entrusts to our first parents:
- Be fruitful and multiply.
- Fill the earth.
- Subdue it.
- Rule.
Some have suggested that God divvied up these four tasks between the man and the woman. The woman was responsible for the first two, to multiply and fill the earth. And the man was to take charge of the last two, to subdue and rule. That division of labour, however, is nowhere in the text. On the contrary, v. 26 says, “Let them rule…” God entrusts both of his first image bearers with the job of filling and governing the earth as his vice-regents. Both are to multiply and fill the earth. And both are to rule over creation.
The Cultural Mandate’s New Testament Application
God tasks our first parents with filling the earth with image bearers. This command speaks primarily of physical multiplication. The Great Commission in Matthew 28:18–20, however, reframes the Christian’s understanding of that calling. So, whether someone is single and never bears children or married and struggling with infertility, they can still fulfill the spirit of Genesis 1:28 by bearing spiritual sons and daughters.
3. Receive God’s Provision (Genesis 2:1–17)
In Genesis 2:7, the narrator takes us back to the sixth day of creation and zooms in. Whereas God speaks the rest of creation into existence through his powerful word, with man, he gets his hands dirty! These verses depict God as a potter, sculpting a flawless masterpiece, complete in every anatomical detail. Yet, it’s lifeless until God draws near and breathes into it the breath of life. And in that instant, the man becomes a living soul.
God’s Good Command
In Genesis 2:8–15, God provides an orchard for the man to enjoy. He has his pick of every fruit he could ask for. All he has to do is avoid one – the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. The Lord God warns him that on the day he eats of it, he will surely die. Sometimes, we take God’s commands as limitations on our freedom. We look past all the good things God has given us to focus on those things that are out of bounds. Yet, his commands are for our good, to protect us and provide for us. Rather than bucking God’s law, let us thank him for keeping us safe through it.
4. Rejoice in God’s Design for Unity (Genesis 2:18–25)
In Genesis 2:18, we discover the first problem in creation: “It’s not good for man to be alone.” Amid the seeming perfection of God’s handiwork, he finally finds something flawed—something that requires fixing: the solitude of man. To remedy this, the Lord God decides to make him a suitable helper.
If you’ve ever felt that “helper” gives women a lower status than men, know that the Old Testament most often uses ezer, the Hebrew term for helper, to speak of the Lord himself! He is the defender and deliverer of his people. Just as God is the one who comes to the rescue of his people, woman is an indispensable aid for man.
The Purpose of Parading the Animals Before Adam
When God discloses that his first image bearer needs a helper, he first forms out of the dust of the ground every wild animal and every bird. God does not do so in the hope that one of these furry or winged creatures will fulfill the man’s need for a companion. God desires, rather, to help Adam see that they are insufficient for that purpose (Genesis 2:20), because the aim of marriage is far more than companionship: it is mission! In a spouse, God provides someone to call a co-labourer, co-regent, co-combatant.
Excursis: Marriage Isn’t Mandatory to Solve Solitude
Many take Genesis 2:18 to mean that marriage is God’s solution to man’s solitude. The problem with this assertion is that many godly Christians never experience the joy of marriage. The truth is that not every believer is promised a life partner. God’s ultimate solution to our solitude is not found exclusively in marriage—it’s found in the bond we share as the family of God.
Therefore, married people should make every effort to live out the meaning of these words beyond their own marriages, in the context of the local church. What’s more, we should teach our children that marriage isn’t promised to them, but a forever family in Christ is. So, regardless of one’s marital status, it’s not good for anyone to be alone. And the remedy to that solitude is Christ and his Bride.
Creation’s First Surgery
In Genesis 2:21–22, the LORD God puts Adam under divine general anesthesia and performs creation’s first surgery. He removes one of the man’s ribs and fashions the woman out of it. And in verse 23, we discover Adam’s reaction to the gift God prepared for him while he slept: he breaks out in song—or at least, in creation’s first poem. He seems utterly enraptured by the woman. After noticing how different all the animals were from him, he finally beholds someone who is just like him! No wings. No hooves. No doggy breath. She is perfect! The purposeful master craftsman has just fashioned him a living work of art!
Genesis 2:23 Highlights Sameness, Not Difference
Notice that he describes her as “bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.” This speaks of essential sameness. In our day and age, we tend to focus on the differences between men and women because those distinctions are under assault. The text, however, doesn’t share our 21st-century agenda. Its purpose in these verses is to describe the joy and wonder of the first man when he meets the first woman and realizes all that they have in common. It is with her that he finds his identity; the man finally knows who he is because he has finally found the one who is like him.
Leaving and Cleaving
Genesis 2:24–25 speaks of two important elements of marriage—elements that often constitute the most common topics of conflict: in-laws and intimacy. Leaving and cleaving means that a husband’s primary duty will henceforth lie with his wife and their burgeoning family. This in no way frees a man from his responsibility to honour and care for his parents. They simply should not be at the helm of his marriage or family life.
Sexual Intimacy as Covenant Renewal
The “one-flesh” union refers to far more than sex; it means that husband and wife are unified in their destiny. The sexual relationship is not merely a shared pleasure. It is the most profound act of covenant renewal.
And yet, sex remains one of the most common areas of conflict in marriage. Libidos and energy levels vary between spouses. Some of this may be due to natural life seasons, such as the period following childbirth or during perimenopause. A lack of interest in sexual activity, however, could have a deeper cause. A caring spouse will seek to understand the reasons for this, as obligation sex should not be a thing.
If a wife frequently feels that she is too tired for intimacy, a husband needs to ask if he is doing his share of the household duties that might be draining her. He should ask his wife if she feels more like a maid than an equal partner. If she is carrying the bulk of the mental and physical load for the family, it’s no wonder she’s exhausted.
That said, wives should never use sex as a tool to manipulate or punish. If a husband is faithful, loving, attentive, hard-working, and considerate, a wife should prioritize the marriage bed. Open communication is the key to building lasting marital intimacy.
A Word on Shame
The concluding words of Genesis 2 speak of a total absence of shame. This stands in marked contrast to the shame most of us have tasted at one point or another ever since the Fall. This is especially true when it comes to our sexuality.
Some wrestle with shame because of past sexual sin. Though they’ve received God’s forgiveness, they are plagued by the memories of their past. The good news is that Christ died for all our sins; there’s no hidden fine print on his covenant. For those who have laid down their burden at the foot of the cross, Christ’s blood covers them completely. They no longer have to carry that weight.
Others carry unwanted shame as a result of sexual abuse. They may have hoped that marriage would bring healing, only to find that it hasn’t. That kind of trauma does not dissipate on its own. Marriage can’t heal those wounds any more than antibiotics can heal a sprained ankle; it is simply not the required treatment. In such cases, trained professionals can help survivors find freedom and move forward with Christ’s help.
Conclusion
Genesis 1–2 introduces believers to God’s perfect design for marriage in the first epoch of redemptive history. In the next article in this series, we’ll explore the lessons for marriage found in the Fall: Our Brokenness and Need for Grace (Genesis 3).
You can find a series of short videos from the conference on my YouTube channel. The audio recording of this session is available here.
